He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
