Your tits are I can't wait for
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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