I showed him my bush... on skype.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
All I want is dick and wine.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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