Well apparently he's into motor boating.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
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