He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
