grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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