im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Randomize
