do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
