Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
