Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
