just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
