But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize