remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
