They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
