Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
