we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
