I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
