i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
