$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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