WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
cat food counts as protein by the way
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
