I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
