she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize