just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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