there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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