Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
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