i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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