bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Randomize
