He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
