I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize