I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize
