lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Randomize
