"it" just moved
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
