one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
