My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
