I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
So much rum. So many feels.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize