wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
