if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize