their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize
