i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
