I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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