the new term for farting is butt boxing.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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