I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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