Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
