So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Randomize
