I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
