she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
