i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
