We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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