Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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