You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
So squirting runs in the family.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Randomize
